Your Song

- Elton John, "Your Song"

---

I think that we autism bloggers face an interesting dilemma when it comes to sharing our lives and those of our children - when do we reveal too much and where exactly is that line? 

Indeed, the question even comes up - should we be chronicling the lives of our children at all?  If their lives are their own, which - ultimately - they are, is it even our right to intrude on the sovereignty of their existences by making it public to the world?

It's an issue I've wrestled with repeatedly in my mind.  In the end, my decision was this - Jack's life was of such value to the world that it should not be withheld from others.  Some of the value I see in Jack is that of the teacher; it is through his life that others can learn of tolerance, differences, and respect.  He lacks the ability at this moment to communicate all of his experiences to the world, so I serve as his voice until the point comes in which he can carry that mantle.  At that time, he will have some choices ahead of him - he can either allow me to continue to share our lives, but at that time it will really be my story as he will have the ability to tell his own in his own way.  

He can also ask me to stop sharing our experiences, in which case I will do so.  As has been noted by readers before, my blog seems to have a conspicuous absence of certain members of our lives.  That is not because of the absence of those people from our world or their estrangement, rather it is a reflection of their request to not be featured in my writing.  As a result, they are not here on these pages.  If Jack asked me to do the same, I would certainly stop writing about him.  At the moment, he does not have the ability to make that judgment call

There is a third option - he can take the reins and write his own story.  I certainly hope he does.  In fact, just a week ago I was sharing my experiences as a writer with a young man at Jack's therapy clinic who is also on the spectrum.  This young man has - from a young age, even for a NT kid - shown talent in his ability to weave a tapestry with words.  Of course, I tried to tell him that the world might love to hear his voice, his thoughts, and his experiences.  I certainly hope he will consider it, because he has a talent to be shared with the world.

If Jack reaches that point, I certainly hope he will share as well.  This is, after all, his song.  Until then, I will be his lungs and his voice to carry his song into the world in the hopes that the world will change a little - just for him.

If I can help be just one instrument of that change through the telling of his story, then it will have all been worth it.  If sharing his story helps bring about a future where everyone listens to his voice, then the story was worth sharing.

I certainly hope and pray that he'll be able - and have the desire - to assume that task one day.  Because the ultimate mark of success for me is a future in which Jack can fully tell his own story.